Alistair: you’re attracted to a sense of humor and there’s a part of you that appreciates cheesy romance
Morrigan: you’re into women that could walk on your face and you’d say thanks
Zevran: you were planning on romancing someone else, and then after meeting Zevran you had a “holy shit Zevran is smooth as FUCK” realization before quickly changing your romance
Leliana: you like cute girls
Anders: someone probably thinks that you’re the most boring person in existence or the most obnoxious person in existence
Isabela: you say “holy shit I am so gay” on a regular basis, or you’re really into women that could walk on your face and you’d say thanks
Fenris: you might have a voice kink
Merrill: you like cute girls
Sebastian: you tend to not get along with people that romanced Anders
Cassandra: you’re definitely into badass women that could walk on your face and you’d say thanks
Blackwall: you’re really into men with beards, you’re a sucker for redemption arcs, or your canon inquisitor is a dwarf (or all of the above)
Iron Bull: you either really wanted to romance Sten in DAO or you’re into extremely muscular men, and if you romanced him with a qunari inquisitor you are physically incapable of shutting up about it
Josephine: you really like cute girls
Sera: you’re gay and you think dick jokes are hilarious
Dorian: you probably really, really hate doribull
Cullen: you probably romanced Alistair in DAO
Solas: you’re attracted to intellect and you enjoy suffering
So my husband tells a story about a guy he worked with at his first job. They’d regularly go to a Thai restaurant near their office – one of those really legit places where grandma is the chef. So the guy says one day to their server, looks this girl dead in the eye, and says “You can’t make it hot enough.”
Server gives him this look like “your funeral” and takes the order to the kitchen. GRANDMA COMES OUT AND LOOKS AT THIS POOR WHITE BOY, shakes her head, and goes back in the kitchen.
When the dish comes out, it’s a solid mass of just RED. Dudes at the table are dying just sitting near it. This guy tries his damnedest, gets about five bites in, and can’t do it. Mr You-cant-make-it-hot-enough was fucking obliterated by Chef Grandma.
And to add insult to injury, they replaced the dish for him, and GRANDMA BRINGS IT OUT, gives him a look and shakes her head.
I think there’s a reasonable chance this was his receipt.
HE BROUGHT IT ON HIMSELF BY TALKING SHIT ABOUT THEIR PAD THAI
Smash that mf reblog button if you stoically ignore all labelled washing instructions and everything your mama ever told you about laundry and just send those bastards hurgling around in an overfilled tub to meet either death or glory
Something I learned from a costume designer: if an item can be washed multiple ways the designer is only legally obligated to put one of the ways on the tag, but if there’s only one way to wash that item they have to put Only on the instructions
If the tag says “Dry Clean” it’s safe to machine wash but the designer thinks it looks better if you get it dry cleaned
But if it says “Dry Clean Only” you will destroy it if you wash it any other way
Reblogging for that last bit which this 37 yr old adult did not lnowy
Captain-Radioactive-Mentality 