“Girls want a Superman, but they walk past a Clark Kent every day”
You fuckin CLOWNS think you’re a CLARK KENT? Not on my fuckin watch. You dumb, headass motherfuckers are barely a Guy Gardner and you think you’re a CLARK KENT? The amount of disrespect is unreal.
Listen here, wannabes: My boi Clark is 240 lbs of PURE KANSAS BEEF trained from a young age by Ma Kent to Love and Respect women as the Intelligent, Independent beings they are. He is shy rambling about tractors and casually moving the copy machine when my pen falls behind it and he would NEVER demand I be sexually or romantically interested just because he’s nice.
Y’all ain’t Clark Kent.
I have never hit the reblog button so damn fast.
“barely a Guy Gardner” is the sickest comics related burn I’ve heard to date.
Having a Turian technican fix your sink, air, wifi.
Oh yes! I’d stand behind him all day 😉
I mean yeah, but that’s pretty creepy.
How about being open with your feelings towards the turian technician? Say he’s a handsome fellow, ask his number. If he’s willing, call him up on the weekend and ask if he’d like to go out for dinner. Chuckle and say, that yes, it’s a date if he wants it to be. Talk about life with him, about the future and then share the bill in half like you’d agreed even though the dextro dishes were a little more pricey. Chuckle as he scratches the back of is head awkwardly as he realizes and apologizes as the two of you walk along the balcony overlooking the beautiful city skyline.
A couple weeks later you’re dating. You’re trying extra hard at work to get a promotion and are charmed to find out that so is he. You look into moving in together and he says he’d be glad to have you. Your landlord is geting quite stingy with money and despite this being a rather big step to make, agree. The gentle excited smile he gives you as he squeezes your hand is worth all the risk in the world.
The night you move in, the two of you cuddle on his couch, each with a bowl of popcorn in hand. The difference in amino acids is a little discouraging but he holds your hand again and assures you that it’ll be fine, you’ll make it work. You lean into his chest you smile. For the first time in a long while you’re left feeling like you have assurance, something to look forward to, someone to share your life with.
You lean into him and run your hand along the side of his head and quietly whisper that meeting him was the best thing that has ever happened to you.
Solas: Yesterday after she finished her discussion with Leliana she… Instead of using the stairs she hurled herself from the top of the tower down onto my desk. Then picked herself up and addressed me as if nothing odd had occurred.
Blackwall: She does it from the battlements as well. Just last week I was strolling by the stables when a dwarf in hundred pound armor came streaking down from the sky like a bloody meteor. Left a dent in the sod. She stood there shuddering for a second and then stood up, grinned, and asked me how I felt about Cullen’s leadership.
Varric: The other day I caught her staring down a cliff in the Storm Coast. I pointed out that there was a path nearby, but she just said, “Nah, I’ve got enough guard for this.” And flung herself off.
Cassandra: I… I was not aware.
Inquisitor: *Lands in a thunderous heap a few feet away* Hey guys, I saw you from the east tower and wondered what the party was all about! What’s everybody talking about?
Captain-Radioactive-Mentality 